Seeing with our hearts
We’re traveling hither, thither and yon today, as they say. Childhood. Chick-fil-A. Bible times. A café. And two blessings—one that was sung at my wedding and one that we can experience in the here and now.
Practicing
When we think about practicing, some of us remember practicing a musical instrument while we were growing up. Others of us think about practicing a sport with our team. Practicing can be a solo or a group experience. When you think about the word practice, what comes to your mind from your life? What was your favorite kind of practice?
My favorite
My favorite was chorale practice in college. We sang this beautiful piece by John Rutter, “A Gaelic Blessing.” An ensemble sang it from the balcony when Brandon and I got married. It was lovely. The other morning, I was singing another John Rutter piece in my head. Our chorale sang it together 40 years ago and it’s still with me.
Little-bitty practice
When we were little-bitties, we practiced walking. We practiced holding a cup and drinking from it. We practiced talking. We practiced coloring and holding a pencil. We practiced tying our shoe laces. We practiced reading. We practiced writing. We don’t think about those skills and all the practice they required. We worked hard to learn those things. Those basics.
Today on Choosing Peace, we’ll look at another area of life that benefits from practice, although we don’t tend to view it that way.
Praying 101
In the last post, I asked some questions and we looked at what Jesus taught about forgiving. Today, we’ll start answering this question: What does Jesus teach us about praying?
Before Jesus gave us The Lord’s Prayer, he taught these important Praying Do’s and Don’ts. Twice in a row, he followed this pattern: “Don’t be like them. Be like this.”
“And when you pray, you are not to be as the hypocrites, for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I tell you, they have received their reward. But you, when you pray, enter into your inner chamber, and having shut your door, pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. And in praying, do not use vain repetitions, as the unbelievers do; for they think that they will be heard for their much speaking.
“Therefore do not be like them, for your Father knows what things you need, before you ask him.”
Matthew 6:5-8, New Heart English Bible
Repeat and receive—or not
Let’s look at Jesus’ second example first. “And in praying, do not use vain repetitions, as the unbelievers do; for they think that they will be heard for their much speaking” (verse 7) or “for their many words” (RSV*). In certain situations, like drum line practice, repetition rocks. It’s absolutely essential. In other situations, repetition is a definite no-no.
Wrong number, wrong line
I grew up in the Christian tradition in the United States. Since I have zero experience with other world religions, I’ve never been around prescribed, repetitive chanting.
Clearly, the key words in verse 7 are vain (i.e., worthless) repetitions and unbelievers. Think of it this way. Have you ever received a long phone message from someone who dialed the wrong number? I have. It’s strange. The person who dialed the wrong number thinks he or she just took care of something, when—in reality—it was a complete waste of time. Wrong number. If I’m in line at a Chick-fil-A drive-thru and repeatedly order a cheeseburger, I’m also wasting everyone’s time. I went to the wrong people. They don’t sell cheeseburgers. I can order a cheeseburger 100 times in a row at Chick-fil-A and I still won’t get one because I’m talking to the wrong people.
The right one
Jesus said, “And in praying, do not use vain repetitions….” In other words, formulas don’t work in praying. First and foremost, we have to call the right number, the right person—Almighty God, our creator. He is the one-and-only triune God—Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Secondly, saying something again and again—because someone told us to—will be a complete waste of time. God isn’t hard of hearing; nor is he forgetful. If God is “your Father,” that means you have a relationship with him. You know him. And “your Father knows what things you need, before you ask him” (verse 8). Skip the chanting. Skip the worthless repetitions. Just talk.
Need vs. want
God knows what we need before we ask him. No one “needs” a phone. On the other hand, we all need water to survive. I’m not saying that God is indifferent to our wants. He’s our loving Father. Right?
Well, Peaceful Readers, we won’t be hiking up and down the long, winding trail of Needs vs. Wants today. Let’s move on. It’s time to pay a visit to The Power Club.
The power club
In the preamble to The Lord’s Prayer, Jesus described the hypocrites first—the scribes and Pharisees; I mean The Power Club. The rule-makers, the rule-followers, the rule-enforcers. They decided who was in and who was out. Members of The Power Club looked squeaky-clean on the outside, but they were filthy and far from God on the inside.
Appearances can be deceiving.
We’re talking about the Wolves-in-Sheep’s-Clothing types. The Showboaters. The Narcissists and Sociopaths. The Control Freaks. “Look at me! Look at me! Look at me!” That sounds like some of our long-lost relatives. For more on that, read the section called Using the Religious Cover in this post.
Why?
Motivation matters. Deeply. Intrinsically. That’s why Jesus started his teaching on prayer that day with the issue of motivation.
Why do we pray? The answer to that question reveals the truth about our hearts.
If we pray to impress or manipulate people, we’re liars. We’re pretending to be talking to God when we’re actually showing off or trying to control people. This motivation problem—I mean pretense—comes in many flavors.
Let’s check out the dessert menu from The Prayer Café, frequented by The Power Club and their unsuspecting audience.
The Prayer Café
Sweet 16 Dessert Menu
1. I-Pray-Better-Than-You White Chocolate Fondue
2. Confession-Without-Contrition Surprise AKA TMI Pecan Pie
3. Support-My-Cause (I mean Slush Fund) Smoothie
4. Cliché-Central-With-A-Hedge-Of-Protection Pineapple Upside-Down Cake*
5. If-You-Care-You’ll-Copy-Me-And-Cancel-Them Caramel Pretzel Brownies**
6. Please-Feel-Sorry-For-Me Pity-Siphoning Peach Cobbler
7. Jesus-Is-My-Homie Fireside-Chat Smores
8. You-Should-Be-Ashamed Black Forest Cheesecake
9. Check-Out-All-My-Blessings Showoff Sundae
10. Propaganda-Push-From-The-Minister-Of-Truth Mississippi Mud Pie
11. Better-Than-The-Sermon Bananas Foster
12. Famous-Name-Dropper Milkshake or Boba
13. Current-Events-And-Geopolitical-Advisor Turkish Delight
14. I-Donate-More-Than-You Devil’s Food Cake
15. Gossip-Extraordinaire Shock-The-Crowd Strawberry Shortcake
And, last but not least… [wait for it… wait for it… **Trumpet Fanfare**] …our most-popular dessert:
16. I’m-Holding-You-Hostage Chocolate Lava Volcano
Funny footnotes and more
*Pssst. Hedges don’t protect people. For more on that, watch this segment from comedian Tim Hawkins. You will crack up.
**Check out this hilarious John Crist video, making fun of the Cancel Culture.
“A cheerful heart makes good medicine….”
Proverbs 17:22a, New Heart English Bible
God said it and he meant it. (Did you know that laughing wakes you up? Read the beginning of this post to find out how I made that discovery.) If you enjoyed the dessert menu from The Prayer Café, I think you’ll totally dig the menu from The Dysfunctional Family Diner.
Peaceful Readers, that was fun. Before we move on, let’s finish our observation of The Power Club.
A memorable example
One time at our old church, a man brought pages of notes up to the microphone for his prayer; I mean his Scripted and So-Stupendously-Sincere Speech. Let’s call him Marvin Monologue. Marvin went on and on for so long that we started timing him. Yikes. He served up a disturbingly-memorable dessert sampler from The Prayer Café, including I’m-Holding-You-Hostage Chocolate Lava Volcano. Marvin loved being the center of attention. He controlled the mic. He controlled the room. He controlled the people.
Marvin thought oh-so-highly of himself. In reality, he was a liar and a thief. He pretended to be praying when he was actually preaching. And he stole hundreds of people’s time under false pretenses.
On a positive note, Marvin was never given the microphone again. Halle-to-the-lujah.
Bad taste
When we experience the prayers of someone like Marvin Monologue—a card-carrying member of The Power Club—we get a very bad taste in our mouths. Kind of like eating citrus fruit and drinking milk. Yuck.
Showing-off and praying to God do not go together because true prayer requires humility.
Where and why vs. where and who
The hypocrites pray publicly to be seen—for attention, control, power. Jesus never mentioned who the hypocrites prayed to. He told us where they prayed and why they prayed—to “be seen by others.” In reality, The Power Club doesn’t pray to God because they don’t know him. They just put on their show, using the concept of God to get what they want.
In Matthew 6:6, Jesus said, “But you, when you pray, enter into your inner chamber, and having shut your door, pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” Jesus knows who the true believers pray to. We pray to our Father in heaven. “Our Father” means that we have a relationship. God knows us and we seek to know him.
For true believers, the vast majority of our praying takes place privately. We treasure our one-to-one time with God, whether we’re at home, in the car, taking a walk or doing something else.
Praying in front of others
Jesus prayed in front of others, so praying publicly isn’t wrong. I believe that Jesus’ words in Matthew 6:5-8 give us a warning. Something like this: “Pray with humility and honor.” We need to be self-aware and examine our own motives for praying in the presence of others—without pride or fear.
Pride and fear
Pride places us above others. It elevates us wrongly. The Power Club gives us a stellar example of pride. But we have our own stories in that department, don’t we? “I would never….” Pride crushes compassion. It’s a dangerous thing. Let’s walk in wisdom instead of pride. For more about wisdom and other virtues, read The Fruit of The Spirit, part 2. To learn more about pride—the most-destructive of The Seven Deadly Sins—click here for a great sermon.
And fear places us under others. It subjugates us wrongly. The fear of man can enslave us.
The barriers
Pride builds a wall between me and other people. When I’m afraid, I hide from people—even when we’re face-to-face. Fear causes me to hide things that God has asked me to reveal—my thoughts, my needs, my feelings. Both pride and fear create barriers between people. They just use different building blocks.
Reflect and pray
Now is a good time to get out your journal to reflect on your own pride and fear. Ask yourself these questions. Are there areas of my life where I’m plagued by pride—thinking too highly of myself? Are there areas of my life where I’m plagued by fear—afraid of what other people will think or say about me? See what God shows you as you write about these barriers and how they’re impacting you.
When we’re praying to God without pride or fear,
we can pray in front of others in spirit and in truth.
Remember that it’s an honor to pray in public—to communicate with God on behalf of those who are gathered together. Pray for yourself before you pray! Relinquish pride and fear. Ask God to give you peace and inspiration.
Practice
Like many other things in life, public prayer takes practice. We can feel nervous. That in itself isn’t an indicator that our motives are in question. For various reasons, many of us have a history of being afraid of public speaking. I can certainly relate to that.
Here’s a funny Frankie Ann Fumble in The Prayer Department. One time I was asked to pray at a ladies’ dinner. My praying was going reasonably well until I forgot where I was and abruptly said, “Uhhh…. I guess that’s all. Amen.” Ha. A couple of the ladies chuckled, but it wasn’t a big deal.
As we walk with the Lord, the Holy Spirit will give us opportunities to face that fear—to practice praying and speaking in front of others. Little by little, our fear will be replaced by faith. Some steps will be baby steps. Others will be giant leaps. Give God the glory for every step forward as you walk away from fear.
Fear and excitement feel similar in our bodies. Be excited, not afraid. Acknowledge excitement. Reject fear.
And practice, practice, practice. When someone asks you to lead a prayer, do it. Ask God to help you. He will.
Who we’re talking to
Life affords us various opportunities to pray to God in the presence of others—at home, at church, in small groups, in service organizations, with friends, when we eat at restaurants, etc. What can we do to ensure that these non-private prayers are pleasing to God? What can we do to ensure that we aren’t like the hypocrites? It’s all about who we’re addressing—who we’re really talking to. Are we praying to God or are we praying for the attention of people? It’s one or the other.
Some people acknowledge that God is powerful, but they don’t love him. Some people believe God to be their creator, but they don’t trust him. Some people believe the Bible to be true, but the love of God hasn’t penetrated their hearts. Not yet, anyway. Believing and receiving are two very different things. Drink in the important truths in this post—about believing vs. receiving, and much more.
The previous paragraph describes some of The Power Club. It also describes some of the seekers.
Seekers
People come to Jesus in many different ways. Some come suddenly; others, gradually.
For some of us, when we felt knocked-down low enough, we finally started to look up. Way up. We laid down our “I’ve got this” prideful self-sufficiency and asked God for help. When we called out to him—finally—those prayers were some of the most earnest and important prayers of our lives. That was my story.
Seeing and trusting
Those early prayers, when we’re not yet all-in, can play a vital part in our conversion—our salvation—to faith in Jesus Christ. We begin to trust God because we finally start to see him. We see him—not with our eyes, but with our hearts. We realize our need for him.
We acknowledge that he really does care. About me. About my mess. About my life. About my future.
Talking, listening, reading
If you’re a seeker, keep on praying. Keep talking to God. And listen. Read the last post for a thought-provoking quote about being silent and hearing God. Read the book of John and then the book of Acts in the Bible. Ask God to show you more of himself—of who he is.
Praying is really just talking to God. Read part 1 for more. Pray with humility. Talk to God from your heart. How does he talk to us? Through his word—the Bible. Through wise, devoted Christians—followers of Jesus Christ. Through music. Through books. Through his creation. Through prayer.
Once you say yes to Jesus, he’ll talk to you through the Holy Spirit—the still, small voice in your own thoughts. That is amazing.
The blessings of public prayer
When your walk with Christ gets to a certain point, people may ask you to pray out loud in various places and groups. Proceed with a peaceful heart. Relax your mind and body. Close your eyes. Take a slow, deep breath. Focus on God and bring to him the needs you perceive within the group. Let the Holy Spirit guide you.
In this Bible passage, Jesus explained the reason for his public prayer—“that they may believe that you sent me.” He prayed publicly to bring people into the kingdom of God and to build their faith.
Our prayers in the presence of others can give people immense comfort, encouragement, truth and peace. Relationships can be strengthened and deepened as we hear others praying for us and as we pray for them. What a blessing.
We learn to trust God more and our faith grows as we pray together.
Not sure where to start? Pray out loud with your family or friends before you eat together. Pray for a good friend while you’re on the phone together. Start small. God will help you grow.
Coming next: I had no idea when I started writing today’s post that it would include another menu. Those are so fun to write. What’s coming next? Good question. In the last post, we looked at praying and forgiving. Next time, we’ll answer this question: How can we look at other parts of The Lord’s Prayer from a forgiving perspective? Other than that, I have no idea what will bubble forth. Come back next time—and get ready for lots of surprises. Until then, thanks for reading and for Choosing Peace.
Healing through truth and music
Peaceful Readers, I’ve found great healing in my life through the beauty and truth of God’s word and through music. I hope the truths and songs that I share at the end of each post will bless you too.
Truth from The Word: Revelation 1:4-8
Song for Healing: “Hymn of Heaven: Song Session” by Phil Wickham
*Revised Standard Version of the Bible, copyright © 1946, 1952, and 1971 the Division of Christian Education of the National Council of the Churches of Christ in the United States of America. Used by permission. All rights reserved.